Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Bmore Mama, MD

I forgot to mention this earlier. Remember waaaay back to last month when I was bitching about this lady at my gym who comes to me asking for advice then argues it? Or kind of doesn't really like what I tell her so she just keeps asking the same thing over and over hoping for a different answer?

Yeah, well now, I'd like to inform you that among the many services I provide to my dear members is the diagnosis and treatment of injury/pain/birth defect. Just call me Doc!

She comes up to me and points to her hip and tells me that she's feeling pain there. I wait patiently for her to go on. When she doesn't, I realize that she's expecting me to tell her what's wrong with her hip. I'd like to meet the doctor that can diagnose anything just from a finger point to a clothed area on a body and the description of pain.

Just to be nice, I ask some questions. When does it hurt? Does it feel like it's a muscle pain or something else? Has she done anything different lately, like take up skiing or ice skating? Then she mentions that one of her hips is higher than the other. That makes things more interesting. But still doesn't award me a medical degree and magical powers. She also informs me that her hamstring is sore sometimes after she runs. Wow, a sore hamstring after a run. That's so freakin weird. I didn't even think you used your hamstrings when you ran. How could it possibly get sore?

Pardon me if I'm a little dry. If you read my previous post, you probably know that I'm not in the best mood of my life. Yet I must type on....

Anyway so this lady goes on and on and somewhere in her ramblings, mentions that her physical therapist that she's seeing for her shoulder told her that the pain in her hip is probably just due to her structure, or the biomechanics of her compensating for unilateral flaws in her structure (those were my words, not hers.....I should totally be a doctor. Or a lawyer.). The PT suggested she shorten her stride length while running. Sounds good to me!

Sooooo she was already kind of diagnosed by someone for whom it's still beyond the scope of her professional skills to diagnose (I used to work in a PT office so I know this) but still wants me to recommend some additional treatment. Or magically cure her. I feel really bad telling her I don't know what to say. I consider making up some stuff. Like telling her hip pain is generally caused by underdeveloped calf muscles. And the only treatment would be to build up her calves until they're the size of tree trunks.

But I remain professional and adopt my co-worker's Blank Stare while politely informing her that I can't tell her what's causing her hip pain, and unless I have a diagnosis from a doctor (a real one, not one appointed by her) then I can't offer any recommendations because then I could potentially be telling her to do something that makes it worse. All I can say is that if something hurts, it's probably a good idea to avoid overworking it.

She tries to argue this, but I have to admit that the Blank Stare is a fairly effective tool in getting people to shut up and leave me alone. Maybe I don't give this guy enough credit.....

1 comment:

Eludius said...

I have a pain right here that hurts when I do this. Any ideas what may be causing it?