Rick James, See-Through Bathing Suits and My Water Breaking

Yes, you can see all three of these at my new gym!

Let me explain.

I joined a local commercial gym because I decided that, as I enter the final 10 weeks of pregnancy, doing things like walking and teaching step classes hurt my peepee. To the extent that it feels like someone spent a good 30 minutes roundhousing me in the crotch. And I mean that not in a kinky way, but in a martial arts way. So I decided to spend a few sessions a week swimming, which would ideally provide me with a good cardiovascular workout (trying not to drown) without all the wear and tear on my poor lady parts. Because they'll be going through enough in 9.5 weeks anyway.

The whole bathing suit ordeal is another post altogether. So fast forward to me, doing my best whale in a skirted one-piece imitation at the pool. I decided this time around not to worry too much about coordinating my breathing with everything else, because the last thing I need to be doing is hyperventilating or drowning. So I just grab a kickboard and kick away, back and forth.

I was kicking away last night, when the door from the men's locker room opened up and slap me with a trout if that wasn't Rick James standing there in his tight swimming briefs. Well, ok, maybe Rick James is dead and this wasn't exactly him. But it was his long lost twin brother, at best.

Maybe just a little shorter. And almost naked.

And with more of a long fro than jheri curl. But it still looked just like him!

Anyway, I went back to kicking up and down my lane. Both Rick and I were not in the best of shape, swimming-wise (at least I have an excuse), and we both stopped kind of frequently at the shallow end to catch our breath.

During one break, I looked around and noticed a few of the older ladies (by "older" I mean anywhere from late 40's to early 70's) who had been in the whirlpool when I first got there were now chatting on a bench near the entrance. One older lady in particular (who was on the younger end of the older lady age spectrum noted above) was wearing a lima bean colored one-piece bathing suit. Which, in and of itself, was not notable.

But the fact that when she dropped her towel, I saw that it was COMPLETELY SEE THROUGH, was. Since she was sitting, I didn't see anything below her waist (thank goodness) but I could completely make out what her entire breast looked like, including how big and how dark her nipple was.

Waaaaaaaaay tmi.

I tried very hard not to look in her general direction for the remainder of my workout. After I left, I wandered into the locker room to change into dry clothes (I was going to shower at home). As I was reaching into my locker to pull out my bag of clothes, I felt something dripping down my leg.

Now, I know I was wet from the pool, but this was a more forceful drip. Almost like I was peeing on myself. But I knew I wasn't peeing. And it wasn't letting up! Immediately I freaked out, thinking my water broke while I was in the pool and I didn't notice it.

I looked down and eventually realized that the water was coming from the stupid little skirt they put on the ugly maternity bathing suit. Somehow it had collected there, and was dripping down my leg.

It was an interesting night at the pool, I look forward to more "Stories from the Gym".